Oh my. What a day. Spent most of it on the phone, do many different kinds of news, from different people filled with different emotions.
Everything seems to be feeding my desires to push forward. To learn, read, learn, and help. I want to show....guide....help, I dont know what the hell it really is. I just want it to happen.
Spring term started yesterday. Online, Psyc 203- going to be work but a good class, Med 111- more of the same-
Human Nutrition--Now thats another story. This is going to be a kick ass class, I am already itching to learn it, I will have to start studying the text as I wont be back in class until next Tuesday and have to get hyped up all over again.
Well, Im going to try to lay down and process some of this roller coaster of a day before I sleep.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Ultrasound During Pregnancy
OK, so. My newest decision in this crazy world of mine. I am really working on getting organized, every bit of my life needs it but right now I'm focusing on organizing my time and that includes studies.
I am going to start researching just one topic at a time. I will continue to have a book to get through, right now being Heart and Hands, but for specific learning I need to do the same thing. I jump around so much! I learn a little of this and a little of that, I know a little about a whole lot of things I have figured out, but I need to focus on one thing at a time. This all may change once I start AAMI, as I'm sure I will be given plenty to focus on then, but for now I am going to start with ultrasound.
Ultrasound has always fascinated me, as it does so many others of course, but in a bit of a different way I think. I even at one time thought I wanted to become an u/s tech. Prior to my discovery of midwifery.
What are we really doing with this great technology? I really do still believe it is great, and has saved plenty of lives when needed. It can tell many things when there is a suspected problem, or a high risk situation. But are we doing good otherwise? There is such a very high rate of false positive with it. Things are seen that really are not there, or not a problem. Today's OBs put so much time into LOOKING for pathology in pregnancy and birth, that they have never learned, or have forgotten about the normal process. I strongly believe that u/s has given them another tool to find that pathology that really isn't a true problem at all.
Take the low lieing placenta. How many women have been told at 20 weeks they will have to have a c-sections because of a "low lieing" placenta? Most cases of this found early in pregnancy actually resolve themselves by the end? Nearly all. And even if it is followed up and found to have moved up as the uterus expanded, the woman and her family have spent the previous months worried, stressing, and preparing to have her normal birth experience taken from her. This is so sad to me.
Even more so my current enquiring mind is questioning the long term effects and safety of this technology on babies. How much information do we have about what these ultrasonic waves are doing to this innocent developing human being. Ever notice how babies squirm away? move and wont hold still while the test is being done? We don't hear it. They do. It is supposed to be VERY loud to them as well. Do they feel it? There is question that permanent damage may be caused by excessive use of use of u/s. This includes doppler for fht. Doppler is actually worse when compared second for second as it is a continuous stream of sound waves, when a picture scan is actually done in pulses. Is this contributing to the ridiculous increase in autism in children today? Hmmmm. I intend to find all I can.
I am going to start researching just one topic at a time. I will continue to have a book to get through, right now being Heart and Hands, but for specific learning I need to do the same thing. I jump around so much! I learn a little of this and a little of that, I know a little about a whole lot of things I have figured out, but I need to focus on one thing at a time. This all may change once I start AAMI, as I'm sure I will be given plenty to focus on then, but for now I am going to start with ultrasound.
Ultrasound has always fascinated me, as it does so many others of course, but in a bit of a different way I think. I even at one time thought I wanted to become an u/s tech. Prior to my discovery of midwifery.
What are we really doing with this great technology? I really do still believe it is great, and has saved plenty of lives when needed. It can tell many things when there is a suspected problem, or a high risk situation. But are we doing good otherwise? There is such a very high rate of false positive with it. Things are seen that really are not there, or not a problem. Today's OBs put so much time into LOOKING for pathology in pregnancy and birth, that they have never learned, or have forgotten about the normal process. I strongly believe that u/s has given them another tool to find that pathology that really isn't a true problem at all.
Take the low lieing placenta. How many women have been told at 20 weeks they will have to have a c-sections because of a "low lieing" placenta? Most cases of this found early in pregnancy actually resolve themselves by the end? Nearly all. And even if it is followed up and found to have moved up as the uterus expanded, the woman and her family have spent the previous months worried, stressing, and preparing to have her normal birth experience taken from her. This is so sad to me.
Even more so my current enquiring mind is questioning the long term effects and safety of this technology on babies. How much information do we have about what these ultrasonic waves are doing to this innocent developing human being. Ever notice how babies squirm away? move and wont hold still while the test is being done? We don't hear it. They do. It is supposed to be VERY loud to them as well. Do they feel it? There is question that permanent damage may be caused by excessive use of use of u/s. This includes doppler for fht. Doppler is actually worse when compared second for second as it is a continuous stream of sound waves, when a picture scan is actually done in pulses. Is this contributing to the ridiculous increase in autism in children today? Hmmmm. I intend to find all I can.
My Baby is 13!
Looking at cousin Brandi's latest 8 week post prompted me to post a little announcment of my own.
My baby is 13 today!!!!! Well, my first baby that is. Thirteen years ago was the most life impacting day I have had yet. I am very thankful for it. I love you Zack.
My baby is 13 today!!!!! Well, my first baby that is. Thirteen years ago was the most life impacting day I have had yet. I am very thankful for it. I love you Zack.
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Heart and Hands (Elizabeth Davis)
This is my current read. I am loving it. (Yes, I am reading my copy, bought from and autographed to me by Liz herself! Yes I am a serious GEEK) I cannot seem to stay in one place. I am so interested to read what she has to say that I keep skipping around. I am trying as of today to start at the beginning.
The more I read, I was reading the chapter on assisting during birth the other day, the more excited I get. The more I want to learn. And learn every bit. I don't even dread cleaning up the messes made. That may change after a couple hundred puddles of blood and amniotic fluid, but right no I'd be happy to follow behind the scene with a bucket of water and towels! Her approach is so real, so caring, and so aware. The balance of clinical-if you call it that- with being absent from the scene. The importance of giving a mother comfort and space. As well as paying attention from that distance and monitoring in a way to be sure all is continuing well. Patience.
Mothers must learn patience too. The medical world has all these women preparing for birth thinking about this clock. The evil clock. Nature has its own damn clock. The healthy baby, and healthy woman will begin labor when it is time. Not when they are told to, or when the woman and her caregivers decide it should be time, but when it is time.
Labor cannot proceed as it should when the mother is not comfortable. The sphincter law makes so much sense. The cervix is a sphincter just as the anus is. A woman is going to open and relax allowing baby to descend, best in a private, familiar, relaxed, intimate setting. The same type of setting she will require to poop. We don't expect women to poop on demand.
How many times have you seen or heard about a laboring woman going into the hospital in early labor, just to have it slow or completely stall out. That labor pattern she was trying to establish has just been completely interfered with. She has been interrupted, poked at, asked questions, and often threatened in one way or another, by total strangers for the first 30 minutes after arriving. Yeah. I don't think this is good for mom or baby. No wonder that baby doesn't want to come into the world surround by such ridiculous chaos.
Ok, I'll stop rambling for now.
The more I read, I was reading the chapter on assisting during birth the other day, the more excited I get. The more I want to learn. And learn every bit. I don't even dread cleaning up the messes made. That may change after a couple hundred puddles of blood and amniotic fluid, but right no I'd be happy to follow behind the scene with a bucket of water and towels! Her approach is so real, so caring, and so aware. The balance of clinical-if you call it that- with being absent from the scene. The importance of giving a mother comfort and space. As well as paying attention from that distance and monitoring in a way to be sure all is continuing well. Patience.
Mothers must learn patience too. The medical world has all these women preparing for birth thinking about this clock. The evil clock. Nature has its own damn clock. The healthy baby, and healthy woman will begin labor when it is time. Not when they are told to, or when the woman and her caregivers decide it should be time, but when it is time.
Labor cannot proceed as it should when the mother is not comfortable. The sphincter law makes so much sense. The cervix is a sphincter just as the anus is. A woman is going to open and relax allowing baby to descend, best in a private, familiar, relaxed, intimate setting. The same type of setting she will require to poop. We don't expect women to poop on demand.
How many times have you seen or heard about a laboring woman going into the hospital in early labor, just to have it slow or completely stall out. That labor pattern she was trying to establish has just been completely interfered with. She has been interrupted, poked at, asked questions, and often threatened in one way or another, by total strangers for the first 30 minutes after arriving. Yeah. I don't think this is good for mom or baby. No wonder that baby doesn't want to come into the world surround by such ridiculous chaos.
Ok, I'll stop rambling for now.
Final Grades
OK-grade update for winter term 2009
Chemistry for Health Occ. 112-5 credit hours-A
Medical Terminology 111-3 credit hours-A
Intro to Business 101-4 credit hours-B
Chemistry for Health Occ. 112-5 credit hours-A
Medical Terminology 111-3 credit hours-A
Intro to Business 101-4 credit hours-B
Friday, March 20, 2009
Finals are DONE!
Oh I'm glad.
Here is what I know- Business final 78%-about what I expected, not too bad, still not sure about how I will fair as a final grade goes though.
Med terminology- well, I just took that one- part of it i get the score right away, the other she still has to grade, I got 91% on the first part, feel pretty good about the rest, I am pretty sure I will have an A in that class!!!
and last but most important to me right now--Chemistry- final exam scores are posted and I got the 2nd highest grade in the class!!! 94% thats an A!! I really think this gives me an A for the term, this is a 5 credit hour class, thats huge! I am actually proud of myself.
SO now I have over a week with NO classes to be doing homework and studying for. What will I do with myself??
Here is what I know- Business final 78%-about what I expected, not too bad, still not sure about how I will fair as a final grade goes though.
Med terminology- well, I just took that one- part of it i get the score right away, the other she still has to grade, I got 91% on the first part, feel pretty good about the rest, I am pretty sure I will have an A in that class!!!
and last but most important to me right now--Chemistry- final exam scores are posted and I got the 2nd highest grade in the class!!! 94% thats an A!! I really think this gives me an A for the term, this is a 5 credit hour class, thats huge! I am actually proud of myself.
SO now I have over a week with NO classes to be doing homework and studying for. What will I do with myself??
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Midwifery Today Conference 2009
I think I am finally feeling well enough to write about this wonderful opportunity that I had.
I attended one day of the 2007 conference and have looked forward to the next one ever since. Due mostly to work, and a little to my kiddos, I was able to attend just 3 days this time, but it was amazing!! There is nothing more powerful than a whole conference room full of midwives, student midwives wishing to carry on an age old tradition, and so many other worlds of women who have a passion for normal, positive birth. The affects of the birth process and experience are soooo strong and important for both women and babies. And this doesn't just mean the hours of birth itself, but the care that mom receives the 9 months before and few months after as well.
Wednesday and Thursday were pre-conference days. I opted, after great struggle, to attend the basic midwifery skills classes. Most of which were taught by Anne Frye and Liz Davis. Those of you that share my passion will know how great that really is. Anne is soooo full of wonderful wisdom. She is so to the point and ready to share her strong views. Not to mention her volumes of Holistic midwifery text is nothing short of the midwife's bible. And I don't mean that lightly. I learned and relearned new things as well as new approaches to and reasons for things I already knew. A whole new expansion on the uncertainty of ultrasound technology, and how much you can really learn about a baby by methods of age old care. The art of palpation and the use of a fetoscope.
And not of least importance by far, intuition, communication, both with mom and baby, and simple presence. Goes to remind me of one of the great things of this work, the way I want to do this work, the only way I believe is right, with continuity of care. You have to build a relationship with each woman, each baby, and grow that relationship with trust and comfort in order to expect a good outcome with your presence as a midwife in the birth space.
OK, I could go on forever, as I have and will. I have also been eyeing Elizabeth's "Hearts and Hands" midwifery guide for a few years now, and just haven't bought it. So when she had a few copies there of her latest edition, which kept coming up in their conversation, I decided to buy it right from her. And guess what? She signed if for me right there. Yes, with my name as who to and all. I felt like a teen age girl at a stupid Jonah's Brothers concert or some shit. I'm such a pathetic geek sometimes. Oh well.
Saturday. By the times Saturday came around, the flu that began earlier in the week had hit me really hard. I called in work, thought I had to stay home and sleep. i couldn't sleep so headed back up. I listened and participated intently to Ina May Gaskin and Michel Odent as they discussed twin birth. The differences in twins, when it is not safe to deliver at home, as well as how to handle the chance of difficulty at home. They do such a good job of reminding everyone that in a healthy normal twin pregnancy, there is so very little difference. A good deal of info about the negative affect that additional people in attendance really had on birth, especially twins. Michel pointed out how people, even midwives are too quick to interfere after the first baby is born, causing mom to snap back out of labor land before that next needed spike of oxytocin happens to facilitate the birth of baby two. He really had good points. Very sobering.
Ina May and Gloria had a great general session on the importance of midwives and women reclaiming the homebirth and normal birth of VBACs, Breech and Twins. We need to do something about the damaging, unnecessary surgery rate of c/s for these births. Twins and breech are variations of normal. It requires training, as well as an attentive eye, but there is no reason that that alone should be an instant section.
Gail Hart is an Oregon midwife, she covered slow labors. She is sooo great, and so entertaining. She brings such a real life approach to birth. "We don't know how long sex will take, never can tell, why should we know how long it will take to get the baby out." HA! so real, just love her. She led the birth stories evening I sat in on as well, her stories are so great to hear. As are everyone else's. Listening to the stories of birth from the attendants pov is so different. I just loved it all.
I attended one day of the 2007 conference and have looked forward to the next one ever since. Due mostly to work, and a little to my kiddos, I was able to attend just 3 days this time, but it was amazing!! There is nothing more powerful than a whole conference room full of midwives, student midwives wishing to carry on an age old tradition, and so many other worlds of women who have a passion for normal, positive birth. The affects of the birth process and experience are soooo strong and important for both women and babies. And this doesn't just mean the hours of birth itself, but the care that mom receives the 9 months before and few months after as well.
Wednesday and Thursday were pre-conference days. I opted, after great struggle, to attend the basic midwifery skills classes. Most of which were taught by Anne Frye and Liz Davis. Those of you that share my passion will know how great that really is. Anne is soooo full of wonderful wisdom. She is so to the point and ready to share her strong views. Not to mention her volumes of Holistic midwifery text is nothing short of the midwife's bible. And I don't mean that lightly. I learned and relearned new things as well as new approaches to and reasons for things I already knew. A whole new expansion on the uncertainty of ultrasound technology, and how much you can really learn about a baby by methods of age old care. The art of palpation and the use of a fetoscope.
And not of least importance by far, intuition, communication, both with mom and baby, and simple presence. Goes to remind me of one of the great things of this work, the way I want to do this work, the only way I believe is right, with continuity of care. You have to build a relationship with each woman, each baby, and grow that relationship with trust and comfort in order to expect a good outcome with your presence as a midwife in the birth space.
OK, I could go on forever, as I have and will. I have also been eyeing Elizabeth's "Hearts and Hands" midwifery guide for a few years now, and just haven't bought it. So when she had a few copies there of her latest edition, which kept coming up in their conversation, I decided to buy it right from her. And guess what? She signed if for me right there. Yes, with my name as who to and all. I felt like a teen age girl at a stupid Jonah's Brothers concert or some shit. I'm such a pathetic geek sometimes. Oh well.
Saturday. By the times Saturday came around, the flu that began earlier in the week had hit me really hard. I called in work, thought I had to stay home and sleep. i couldn't sleep so headed back up. I listened and participated intently to Ina May Gaskin and Michel Odent as they discussed twin birth. The differences in twins, when it is not safe to deliver at home, as well as how to handle the chance of difficulty at home. They do such a good job of reminding everyone that in a healthy normal twin pregnancy, there is so very little difference. A good deal of info about the negative affect that additional people in attendance really had on birth, especially twins. Michel pointed out how people, even midwives are too quick to interfere after the first baby is born, causing mom to snap back out of labor land before that next needed spike of oxytocin happens to facilitate the birth of baby two. He really had good points. Very sobering.
Ina May and Gloria had a great general session on the importance of midwives and women reclaiming the homebirth and normal birth of VBACs, Breech and Twins. We need to do something about the damaging, unnecessary surgery rate of c/s for these births. Twins and breech are variations of normal. It requires training, as well as an attentive eye, but there is no reason that that alone should be an instant section.
Gail Hart is an Oregon midwife, she covered slow labors. She is sooo great, and so entertaining. She brings such a real life approach to birth. "We don't know how long sex will take, never can tell, why should we know how long it will take to get the baby out." HA! so real, just love her. She led the birth stories evening I sat in on as well, her stories are so great to hear. As are everyone else's. Listening to the stories of birth from the attendants pov is so different. I just loved it all.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Finals
Yes. It is that time. And what has happened here? I have the flu. BAD. I still have no idea how I did on my last Chem exam as I was not in class the last day. I was instead learning from some of the greatest at the Midwifery Today conference. But that is another post.
So tomorrow is my Chem final, and I havnt even read the last chapter on Acids and Bases. Maybe my certainty in the material on molarity, hydrocarbons and ionic and covalent molecular bonds will pull me through. Yeah, feeling like this I dont know if I will be able to fill in the bubbles for my ID number on the scan tron sheet. But what can you do.
Then I will still have to schedual my Business and Med Terminology finals for later in the week. I dont know if Im going to pull off a decent grade in business. I really hate that class and I'm really glad its almost over. I never did turn in my article review. opps!
Next term I am taking Human nutrition. Hmm, that will be useful for sure and I'm afraid a huge wake up call to me too. I know this stuff, I just am not so good at practicing what I preach.
So tomorrow is my Chem final, and I havnt even read the last chapter on Acids and Bases. Maybe my certainty in the material on molarity, hydrocarbons and ionic and covalent molecular bonds will pull me through. Yeah, feeling like this I dont know if I will be able to fill in the bubbles for my ID number on the scan tron sheet. But what can you do.
Then I will still have to schedual my Business and Med Terminology finals for later in the week. I dont know if Im going to pull off a decent grade in business. I really hate that class and I'm really glad its almost over. I never did turn in my article review. opps!
Next term I am taking Human nutrition. Hmm, that will be useful for sure and I'm afraid a huge wake up call to me too. I know this stuff, I just am not so good at practicing what I preach.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Counting Down...
Seems that is my story right now! Everything is a countdown. Lets start with the Midwifery today conference. My first class of the pre-conference will begin in 35 hours. That is less than two days. I have not packed, figured out what to take or wear or anything. I am sooo excited!! And to say that I am going with the true mind of a student of midwifery. WOW. I may actually get to use the knowledge I am so carefully and slowly and insanely trying to gather.
That brings us to #2. It is now 31 days until I can write that initial check and put the paperwork in the mail for AAMI. WOW. Oh, wait, I already said that! I am still scared but have calmed down now. I am actually begining to embrace this opportunity. The confidence will come with time and feedback Im sure. Funny how much feedback in our lives honestly effects us and our decisions and successes. hmm, topic for another time.
I have been going over the book list for the AMS program. Yeah, that is scarey in itself. I have to remind myself that I really do have over 3 years. Over 3 years. I was actually surprised how many of those books I already had on my wish list. Titles I thought could be very helpful in self study until I could begin the program a couple more years down the road. Maybe I really am on the right track.
#3-The end of winter term at Umpqua Community College. I took my 3rd Chem exam today. I wan't real pleased with how I completly drew a blank on the subject of Saturated and Unsaturated Hydrocarbons. I think I did well with the namings, and better than expected on molarity. I know this means nothing to anyone else, but that is the point in me writing so that is was others get. Now there are officially 11 days to the end of the term. I will miss my last Chem class for the conference, but I think I will be able to pull it together for the final next Monday. I will take the other two finals Thursday. Leaving then 11 days to the begining of Spring term. I still need to find one more class to fill credits for spring. Everyhting that I am after is not offered and I have to wait to begin the sequences until summer or fall.
#4-Mom is coming home. I cant really put a count down on it, but it will be soon. I miss my mom and baby sister. Although 16.5 yo is no longer a baby. I am sad that it has to be illness and such in the family that brings us back together, but sometimes that is just how it happens. So we the kids and I are all really excited for her to get back here.
Could add to the list for ever I guess, like waiting for the birth of a new neice or nephew in Aug. or my cousin getting to experience motherhood, after years of being uncertain, finally it will happen in November. So many things to look forward to. That is good for me as I am now thinking in terms of looking forward, rather than worry. That is a really good thing!
That brings us to #2. It is now 31 days until I can write that initial check and put the paperwork in the mail for AAMI. WOW. Oh, wait, I already said that! I am still scared but have calmed down now. I am actually begining to embrace this opportunity. The confidence will come with time and feedback Im sure. Funny how much feedback in our lives honestly effects us and our decisions and successes. hmm, topic for another time.
I have been going over the book list for the AMS program. Yeah, that is scarey in itself. I have to remind myself that I really do have over 3 years. Over 3 years. I was actually surprised how many of those books I already had on my wish list. Titles I thought could be very helpful in self study until I could begin the program a couple more years down the road. Maybe I really am on the right track.
#3-The end of winter term at Umpqua Community College. I took my 3rd Chem exam today. I wan't real pleased with how I completly drew a blank on the subject of Saturated and Unsaturated Hydrocarbons. I think I did well with the namings, and better than expected on molarity. I know this means nothing to anyone else, but that is the point in me writing so that is was others get. Now there are officially 11 days to the end of the term. I will miss my last Chem class for the conference, but I think I will be able to pull it together for the final next Monday. I will take the other two finals Thursday. Leaving then 11 days to the begining of Spring term. I still need to find one more class to fill credits for spring. Everyhting that I am after is not offered and I have to wait to begin the sequences until summer or fall.
#4-Mom is coming home. I cant really put a count down on it, but it will be soon. I miss my mom and baby sister. Although 16.5 yo is no longer a baby. I am sad that it has to be illness and such in the family that brings us back together, but sometimes that is just how it happens. So we the kids and I are all really excited for her to get back here.
Could add to the list for ever I guess, like waiting for the birth of a new neice or nephew in Aug. or my cousin getting to experience motherhood, after years of being uncertain, finally it will happen in November. So many things to look forward to. That is good for me as I am now thinking in terms of looking forward, rather than worry. That is a really good thing!
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
A little of me-and a little of right now.
So here I am. Thought I'd give this blog thing a try!
I will try to get something into my about me section on here, but I havn't figured out yet on how to use this.
My name is Lisa. I am a divorced mother of 3 kids. Zack is almost 13, Drake is 7 and my little girl Selina is 5. I have been divorced over a year and a half now, and sometimes it feels like just yesterday, other times it feels like forever.
I have had a dream that slowly built and changed for more than 3 years. I knew several years before that, that I wanted an involvment in pregnancy and birth. Thought I would go a techy route way back then, I had no idea about the world of homebirth. It scared me to think about it although I have always had a passion for what I viewed as natural birth. Always had a bit of a hippie inside of me too, but thats another day.
So I began to read, research and learn. I had a dream of midwifery that seemed impossible. I went through DONA's training to become a doula 3 years ago this spring. Wow. I thought it would be a good stepping stone. I was wrong in a way. Doula work is great work, but it isn't me, not deep down. I chose to not pursue certification with the organization as to leave some freedom of choice in my care. I have still felt that I am not quite confident enough in myself to follow through and actually chase that dream for a good solid, hands on education in midwifery. Never letting go of the thought, chasing every bit of it. And as I have done so my ideas and thoughts and deep feelings on birth have continued to evolve and warp into the direction of peace=beauty , privacy=saftey and hands off means so much more.
Taking us to now. 4 Days ago Carla of AAMI posted her quarterly drawing entry quiz. I was spending a few minutes to myself going through email. This one interested me as it was on multiple pregnancies. So I did some googling, read and learned more than needed to reply, and sent my entry. I didnt think about it for a minute after. Until reading emails after work yesterday. There is was. I just happened to be curious as to what types of prizes she was offering, thinking I may enter again next time. I get to the bottom of the list and there....My name. What! How did that get in there, I thought there was alot more time between that posting of the quiz and the results of the draw. Nope, it was there. My name. $777 off Advance Midwifery Studies. Wow.
I hop on the phone to call my mommy. I must have sounded insane. I decide I had better email Carla and make sure it is real, tell her my thoughts and go from there. She wrote back like iwthin the hour. Said that if I was going to put so much down, I would get the 20% off as well for payment in full discount. OMG. So i bug the ones closest to me. Mom trys to reassure me that I am really smart and strong enough. I get my friend Jeannies thoughts and her drama comes out all the way. And then my man. I expected a little different, a little more cautious thoughts on his part, but it wasnt what I got. He thinks it is ment to be. What else do I do..... Run to Mothering to post. What a great outpour of support from those girls. That is what made me decide I need a blog. My posts are always the length of a book, so this seems best.
Today I replied to Carla's offer. I will be filling out the application and have my paperwork and payment in to her by April 15. I will be a student of midwifery studies. And a student of AAMI.
I will try to get something into my about me section on here, but I havn't figured out yet on how to use this.
My name is Lisa. I am a divorced mother of 3 kids. Zack is almost 13, Drake is 7 and my little girl Selina is 5. I have been divorced over a year and a half now, and sometimes it feels like just yesterday, other times it feels like forever.
I have had a dream that slowly built and changed for more than 3 years. I knew several years before that, that I wanted an involvment in pregnancy and birth. Thought I would go a techy route way back then, I had no idea about the world of homebirth. It scared me to think about it although I have always had a passion for what I viewed as natural birth. Always had a bit of a hippie inside of me too, but thats another day.
So I began to read, research and learn. I had a dream of midwifery that seemed impossible. I went through DONA's training to become a doula 3 years ago this spring. Wow. I thought it would be a good stepping stone. I was wrong in a way. Doula work is great work, but it isn't me, not deep down. I chose to not pursue certification with the organization as to leave some freedom of choice in my care. I have still felt that I am not quite confident enough in myself to follow through and actually chase that dream for a good solid, hands on education in midwifery. Never letting go of the thought, chasing every bit of it. And as I have done so my ideas and thoughts and deep feelings on birth have continued to evolve and warp into the direction of peace=beauty , privacy=saftey and hands off means so much more.
Taking us to now. 4 Days ago Carla of AAMI posted her quarterly drawing entry quiz. I was spending a few minutes to myself going through email. This one interested me as it was on multiple pregnancies. So I did some googling, read and learned more than needed to reply, and sent my entry. I didnt think about it for a minute after. Until reading emails after work yesterday. There is was. I just happened to be curious as to what types of prizes she was offering, thinking I may enter again next time. I get to the bottom of the list and there....My name. What! How did that get in there, I thought there was alot more time between that posting of the quiz and the results of the draw. Nope, it was there. My name. $777 off Advance Midwifery Studies. Wow.
I hop on the phone to call my mommy. I must have sounded insane. I decide I had better email Carla and make sure it is real, tell her my thoughts and go from there. She wrote back like iwthin the hour. Said that if I was going to put so much down, I would get the 20% off as well for payment in full discount. OMG. So i bug the ones closest to me. Mom trys to reassure me that I am really smart and strong enough. I get my friend Jeannies thoughts and her drama comes out all the way. And then my man. I expected a little different, a little more cautious thoughts on his part, but it wasnt what I got. He thinks it is ment to be. What else do I do..... Run to Mothering to post. What a great outpour of support from those girls. That is what made me decide I need a blog. My posts are always the length of a book, so this seems best.
Today I replied to Carla's offer. I will be filling out the application and have my paperwork and payment in to her by April 15. I will be a student of midwifery studies. And a student of AAMI.
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