It has been a week since I was on here. I have been studying, and neglecting my housework. I have been feeling guilty because I complain about Drake's soccer
schedule. I have been up and down. The sun has come out and gone away. My grandma seems to be doing well, considering she knows she now will live with cancer in one way or another for the rest of her life, no matter how short or long it may be. I have been through a new spell of anger and sadness surrounding the fact that I have a
niece only a few miles away, coming up on her 2
nd birthday that I
don't know, and another
niece or nephew on the way that I will not get to hold either. And last but not least, I'm still holding out hope for my Brandi Kat , her DH and little bean.
Ok, now that nonsense rambling that means nothing to most in this world is over, I got all the paperwork to send into
AAMI printed off, filled out and Thursday will have the checks ready and in the mail!!!!!
AHHHH I cant wait, but know that it is the start of another crazy, time consuming time of my life. I am really struggling with not feeling guilty over it and was hoping these feelings would stay away until I had sent the papers off.
Nutrition, he has us diving into menu planning based on what my Basel
Metabolic Rate is. Yep, sick awakening really, I should only be consuming just over 1600 calories a day. WHAT! No wonder I cant drop these damn 20 pounds! This is going to be one of those classes that is just a huge wake up call.
Easter is Sunday, I
don't think I will drag the kids out before the sun to go to service. I didn't go last year either. I really hate that. It is my time, I
don't go to church. I have my own reasons for that, but I do go to
Easter service. It is my time for it, it is all for me. It
isn't something I want to do if I am being distracted by everyone around me. That of course leaves another feeling of guilt for not taking the kids as
I'm sure they could
benefit from it as well. Maybe next year.
I am really in pretty good spirits, even if it
doesn't seem so- Excited to see what the rest of spring holds and dive into summer, literally, I cant wait to hit the river!